28Nov20
Realisation!
Only the Power of No can truly grant you the Power of Yes. Without the former, all decisions and actions are somehow only a ‘maybe’, a ‘let’s see how it goes’, or a ‘what’s happening to me?’.
If you say a Positive No to X, you simultaneously say Yes to Y
Examples of No=>Yes:
- No: Messy desk = Yes: Tidy desk
- No: Procrastination = Yes: Feeling on top of things
- No: Overbooking myself = Yes: Delivering efficiently
I’ve been practising saying No:
- I said No to a new case yesterday because I’m just too busy. That felt hard/sad, but also a relief.
- When I received another really horrible email from a particularly heightened client, I actually said No by not replying to or engaging with them. It was an internal No to giving yet more energy to this individual.
- When someone asked for my time when it’s already booked out, I conveyed boundaries to the time I was prepared to offer.
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I had a glimpse of a new idea yesterday. It’s a One Jam Flavour approach to my work.
Instead of doing 14 different types of training…
Offer ONE. ‘How to Dialogue.’ A four x half-day course (with pre-learning/homework like MHFA) that includes all my learning about conflict resolution, so it’s perfect for clients who don’t want to mediate, but want to understand how to resolve their own disputes. Why is that so important? Sometimes I think people think I will resolve their disputes, without them having to change a thing, or learn any new skills. I don’t enjoy that! I’d prefer to work with people who want to learn and take responsibility for their role in conflict. Of which there are many. In fact, I’d even say that those people are rather too unlikely to ask for mediation when they really need/deserve it. I’m clearly an interpersonal mediator and interpersonal disputes do not get settled with a cheque, or even a quick break up. Forgiveness, trust, letting go, wishing well, feeling seen, fairness… these are all spiritual processes and take more than a mediation meeting. Interpersonal disputes are a karmic invitation to grow and to stretch and to heal. That takes learning new skills. And for me, good, authentic, vulnerable dialogue is at the heart of all interpersonal healing and reparations and understanding.
Happy birthday to you. Sounds like you found your Next Step.
Thank you! Really?
You’ve been asking for your Next Step. Seems to us like it’s pretty clear.
And the qigong fits perfectly too.
Omg. The School Of Dialogue: teaching ‘How to Dialogue – from win-lose debate to win-win communication.’ or ‘Stop debating – start relating’. And offering Dialogue Facilitation / Team Dev / Mediation as case work.
May this be my birthday wish?
What about your earlier wish for intuition and knowing?
I think that one was answered already. ❤️
Your wish is our command.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
On this my 46th birthday, I am evoking the Power of YES!
Yes to TheSoD and to How to Dialogue. Amen!!
I am evoking the Power of YES!