Pivot 132: I am prepared and pleased with my work #ItAintSquareToPrepare
Good morning. It was so interesting – I could see myself compulsively Surface Swimming across the working day yesterday. I promised myself I would hold all emails til 5.00pm, but no, I ended up incessantly answering them as they came in… And I put off the Deep-Dive training prep that I was actually looking forward to. In other words, I was like the White Rabbit scuttling along all day, constantly at 5 o’clock…!
I am coming to see that the key to ‘spending more time receiving the elixir of Here and Nowness’ is…. prosaic though it might sound…
Preparation In Advance
Because only when you have things tied up way early can you stop and switch off … and approach the actual activities calmly. It also gives time for the mind to accommodate what’s upcoming. I so used to wing everything… like the White Rabbit. No more White Rabbit.
Another point. As I did get ‘time receiving the elixir of Here and Nowness’ I realised that in many ways, this is exactly what stimming is. In stimming, we bask and deep-dive and high-fly in the bliss of the Here and Now. That’s why the intervention ABA is so sad and problematic: it’s forcing beautiful children who are so advanced (see Abraham) to retreat from the perfect Here and Now into the misaligned There and Then.
But now we are in a new paradigm. This is the pivot. From struggle in the There and Then …. to Here and Now peace, and receiving the elixir of life. Abraham summed up the end of struggling brilliantly here.
What stood out for me from ACIM (Chapter 10: How is Judgement Relinquished?) was:
“M-10.5. Therefore lay judgment down, not with regret but with a sigh of gratitude. 2 Now are you free of a burden so great that you could merely stagger and fall down beneath it. 3 And it was all illusion. 4 Nothing more. 5 Now can the teacher of God rise up unburdened, and walk lightly on.
[Also… Why our judgment is constantly flawed:M-10.3. The aim of our curriculum, unlike the goal of the world’s learning, is the recognition that judgment in the usual sense is impossible. 2 This is not an opinion but a fact. 3 In order to judge anything rightly, one would have to be fully aware of an inconceivably wide range of things; past, present and to come. 4 One would have to recognize in advance all the effects of his judgments on everyone and everything involved in them in any way. 5 And one would have to be certain there is no distortion in his perception, so that his judgment would be wholly fair to everyone on whom it rests now and in the future. 6 Who is in a position to do this? 7 Who except in grandiose fantasies would claim this for himself?]
Show me how to ‘rise up and walk lightly on’…
We guess you are aware of the relationship between the White Rabbit and relinquishing judgment?
The White Rabbit is stuck in judgment: of self, of time, of reality… That is why he is care-worn and weary. Could he… would he… but ‘lay judgment down’, he would experience himself, time and reality very differently. He would see them as God sees them: perfect and complete.
Is there a link between ‘preparation in advance’ (PIA) and laying judgment down? I notice that PIA might seem a bit efforty and time orientated…
You can only effectively PIA if you are prepared to remove judgment from your preparations. The reason you can never comfortably prepare in advance is that you are reluctant to say. “Yes, that is done and complete, and I am well pleased with my work.” To you, the work is rarely done – and when you are pushed into completion, you drag your feet, your procrastinate and you stress yourself… only to give yourself 4 minutes of relief afterwards. No wonder you are reluctant to going back to completion of tasks the next time one appears…
So, it’s a form of ‘perfectionism’, this judgment of mine?
In truth, it’s anti-perfectionism. You are happy to declare something imperfect.
Unlike Mary Poppins – who declares herself ‘practically perfect in every way’.
How would you like to proclaim yourself ‘prepared and pleased with your work’.
I think I would love that very much. I can see that it is possible to re-order my activities so that I prep in advance and feel reassured that ‘it’s in the bag’. I can see how this might boost my self-esteem too. I love to be ‘a good girl’, don’t I? Or at least, my inner child longs to be so! (Maybe the teenage girl was convinced she was not a good girl…) So it is helpful to do things that make us feel like a good girl. I remember how great I felt when I had my homework done early!! Not just relieved, but regal...! If I prioritise PIA over anyone else’s ‘urgent’ requests, like emails… then I will arrive at those requests with a greater sense of confidence. It’s ok not to jump to other’s urgent requests. My PIA work is key to my being able to arrive at, and receive the elixir of, Here & Nowness. And I am happy to drop the thought of ‘it’s not good enough yet’. If I allow myself to be pleased with my work, I will value it more and let it go faster, and stop overwhelming people with the sheer quantity of what I foist on them! I know I know my stuff. I also know that others know theirs. Let’s each of us bless ourselves with the gift of being prepared and pleased with our work. No more White Rabbit – he’s retired!
I am prepared and pleased with my work
PS. I just realised. Somewhere along the line (about 12yo?) I picked up that it was ‘square’ to prepare (it rhymes)! Man, how things stick. New protocol:
It ain’t square to prepare
It’s actually autism-friendly for this particular can of beans.