Help me into this disquiet. What are the messages in my fluctuating emotions? Karla McLaren calls emotions ‘action-requiring neurological programs‘ – a definition from Damasio. Using Karla’s list of emotions (downloadable pdf here) I can identify in myself feelings of sadness, specifically disconnected and sorrowful and disquieted. A reaction in me, I sense, to the displays of vainglory by our ruling politicians, here and abroad; their manipulation of peoples with lies and empty promises; their whipping up of hatred and ‘othering’; their incitement to the vanity of national ‘pride’ (not called one of the seven deadly sins for nowt); their narcissism and their carelessness and punitive attitude towards those who are vulnerable, displaced and dependent on the kindness of strangers.
If you’re reading this down the line in another time, here in this video is an example of the extraordinary turn this country has taken against ‘the Other’. I choose this video because it’s an everyday person being affected (as opposed to the homeless or disabled person or single parent or immigrant or any other Other, who has been targeted by this govt for 10 years, largely under the radar or awareness of the ‘middle class every day person’ who never expected to find themselves as the Other…):
McLaren says that:
‘Sadness requires that you take action to let go of something that isn’t working anyway, and grief requires that you actively mourn something that is lost irretrievably.’
Time to let go of….?
Hope that the current political system will deliver anything other than more of the old.
As far back as 1995 it was understood by you that the new had to arise out of the burning ashes of the old.
But I thought it would emerge sooner rather than later…
It was always going to be a matter of more or less pain being the catalyst to change.
I thought we’d peaked… And instead, it got worse. The internet and social media became the weapon of choice for the ruling elite, surpassing even the complete saturation of mainstream media, and we weren’t prepared for that onslaught. And in fact, no one would have imagined in a million years, that these smiling politicians (jolly old buffoons etc – BJ and DT in UK and US) would use the techniques of large-scale mental manipulation, dog-whistling and lying… It’s horrific.
What is it you sometimes say to yourself when you watch these individuals acting like snakes?
I’m hesitant to say it because it sounds sexist.
Say it nonetheless…
The future is female
Ok. Ty. This is helpful because…?
Well, it’s certainly not saying the women are blameless in this whole f***ing sh*tshow! In the UK cabinet, PP is absolutely staggering in her hatred, vanity and carelessness towards humans…
No, the other thing…
Ah, yes. It’s helpful because it doesn’t mean ‘sack the men’, it means bring in the yin aspects and the divine feminine, to balance the yang and the divine masculine. As Abdu’l-Baha said:
The reason this is brought to your attention (tractor beam!) today is the following: if sadness/grief is a call to let go of the old, then it is also a desire to move forward with the new. It is a call to action. So what is the new? What is the opposite to: large-scale mental manipulation, dog-whistling and lying, incitement to ‘pride’, narcissism, carelessness towards the vulnerable?
It’s those things we talked about yesterday:
- compassionate communities
- peaceful relationships
- sustained wellbeing
And so could it be possible that your immense sadness is what you feel when you focus on the old/broken just at the darkest point before the dawn of your letting-go of the old/broken and INVOKING the new/emerging.
If I go back to Karla McLaren on the Gifts of Sadness I see her encouragement to bring FLUIDITY to sadness. YES. Because I have this feeling of stuckness. In fact, I said to the shiatsu practitioner last week, ‘I’d like to feel the flow of intuition in me – I’m getting stuck, not just in my back, but in indecision.’ Is emotions are ‘action-requiring neurological programs’ what actions am I being invited to undertake? See this from Karla McLaren:
SADNESS: The Water Bearer
ACTION REQUIRED: Sadness arises when it’s time to let go of something that isn’t working anyway. If you can truly let go, relaxation and rejuvenation will follow.
GIFTS: Release ~ Fluidity ~ Grounding ~ Relaxation ~ Rejuvenation
THE INTERNAL QUESTIONS: What must be released? What must be rejuvenated?
Sadness is a wonderful emotion that arises when something needs to be released. This might be an idea, an attitude, a possession, a stance, an ideology, a belief, a relationship, or a way of behaving in the world (etc.) that no longer works for you. Sadness has a kind of alchemical magic to it, because if you can listen to it and honestly let go, you’ll find that you can relax and breathe again. Sadness is about letting go — and letting go means that you’ll be freer than you were before (when you were holding on tightly to something that was honestly not working). When you can listen to your sadness and work with it empathically, you’ll experience relaxation, spaciousness, and a sense of rejuvenation.
Many people have problems with sadness, and as I think about it, I sense what I call a fundamental correlation error. That’s a fancy way of saying that people often blame sadness for the way they’re feeling, instead of realizing that sadness arises in response to the fact that they’re holding on to something that isn’t working anyway.
https://karlamclaren.com/welcoming-the-gifts-of-sadness/ [Also, do buy her extraordinary book, ‘The Language of Emotions’]
So, what isn’t working?
The old way of working.
Ha. Yes, I know, the pushpushpush… What is the new/emerging?
Peace on Earth … embodied by those who truly want it.
Ah, so you (I) can’t just chat this stuff, we have to embody it!
Bingo. This is the New.
And that clearly involves getting out of the head, where the drama-generating thought happens…?
And into the body…
Even though that ‘hurts’ because then you feel all the emotions…
And are then able to embark on the actions required by the neurological programme. (‘Emotions are action-requiring neurological programs.’)
Embark on the actions.
Embark on the actions.
Embark on the actions.
Share the tools..?
Embark on the actions.
Every time the sadness of the old arises, use that e-motion-al to generate the motion towards the new.
Simplify, simplify, simplify. There is no time or energy for fancy pants… It’s got to be short, sharp, simple, fearless, generous, abundant, self-sacrificing.
Self-sacrificing. I don’t think we’ve used that word before tbh…..
Consider what it means in terms of this new reality, this vision of compassionate communities, peaceful relationships and sustainable wellbeing?
Definitions of self-sacrifice
- sacrifice of oneself or one’s interest for others or for a cause or ideal
- giving up one’s own interests or wishes in order to help others or advance a cause.
What are my interests or wishes that I’ve been defending? Maybe that’s not the point. Hm… So maybe it’s about focusing on the bigger picture more than ‘just my own’?
There we go.
Focus my attention on the bigger picture (vision) and the mission, and embark on the actions (practices).
Embark on the actions
PS. Ask yourself: who is the main beneficiary of my actions? The laws of true self-sacrifice state the when the main beneficiary of a person’s actions is the Other, the Self is protected too.
STO vs STS
So in embarking on actions for the bigger picture (the vision) ask: CUI BONO? (To whom the benefit?)
This was easy when the girls were little – it was the girls. Then for a while it’s been all about ME – in recovery, personal, financial etc.
Well this is now about maturing as a person in your world. Good news. ❤️