I am loving the idea of the Mental Stage. Before I go to sleep, after writing my top 10 ABCD’s (Achievements, Blessings, Confirmations, Dones), I’ve been drawing Mental Stages with scenes I would like to see – picturing myself in the scene with fellow actors of my choice, in scenarios that uplift my heart and soul. It’s in the spirit of a) ‘I dreamed a dream..’ and b) ‘Are you knowing what you’re wanting?’ – and it reminds me that as DirectorMe I’m also PlaywrightMe.
Tell us about that line you saw yesterday.
I’m embarrassed to… Ok. Yesterday, I got followed on Twitter by one of those dudes (bots?) with 67 followers and a picture of him and his kid. His bio said (and this is from memory because I went to check just now and the account’s been suspended..!): ‘My life is too easy for me God made it that way.‘
And why did that line stand out?
Well, obviously, first, I scoffed.. But I guess I was struck by the perspective, the concept, the radical idea that life is (or is meant to be) easy or easeful, by design (divine or not).
And why does that concept stand out?
Because I feel I could break at the moment… The complexity of my work and my days. Waking up in alert mode between 4 and 6.30am… Super-zoning-in to get things done…
STOP!
Woah… That was very Gurdjieffian! Hm… I hear the wake up call, the call to attention. What are you saying?
“DirectorMe I’m also PlaywrightMe.” Take care, sweet soul, with the script you write.
Aha… Yes.
Write a different script. Write a script of Ease.
(When you say that, I note a tiny flicker of angst: What would I feel without the brain stim of 24/7 demand, activity, intellectual wrangling, the pushpushpush…? Boredom??)
…
Aha! Excellent! So what this helpfully tells me is that: I think/believe/assume, in my subconscious or some part of me (shadow?) that “Ease = Boring”. Amiright, right? And so, I constantly create and recreate ‘excitement’… (which actually, and especially at this stage of my life = stress).
So, presumably, I always/mostly take the ‘hard’ route instead of the ‘easy’ (aka, in my subconscious mind: ‘sad, simple, pointless, non-ego-puffing, stupid, basic, non-PLU’?!) route.
√
It’s also because my brain is wired to work with complexity, right?
To an extent. It’s also because you haven’t fully worked on developing your Autism Zen Zone (though the Peak project was indeed so good in that arena). We’ll explain. All that complex wiring: when you’re in flow, you do a 100 things super fast – it’s amazing, productive, and exhausting because it burns through spoons, but also it gives you the reward of dopamine, and the relief of completion. Undertaking ‘the 100 things in flow’ can be like being in a sacred trance of activity.
Like Wednesday (after my frozen day) when I got on the flow wave and sat unmovingly at my desk for 4 straight hours, and only moved because G made lunch and called me down from the office. I had done about a week’s work in those 4 hours, and never made it back to the desk after breaking the trance… How could I just ‘summon’ that powered-up hyper-focus state again?
Hyper-focus, that’s the word. You are brilliant at hyper-focusing on projects. That’s why saying ‘Yes’ to new stuff is a ‘given’ to you: you know you can and you associate the innovation with a certain neural (stim) buzz.
Autism Zen Zone = take that same extraordinary hyper-focus, and turn it within.
But don’t I do that here?
No. This is still an external project. We mean entirely ‘within’.
Like meditation?
If you will.
The calm interiorised mind, of Morphogenesis.
If you like.
Well, mindfulness is the cornerstone of MEDS… But I don’t tend to practice it…
Because you’ve been doing it Neurotypical style.
What do you mean?
In your brief mindfulness practices, do you feel that trance state where you could sit on your chair for 4 hours?
Ha… No. These days, I hold about 5 to 20 minutes.
That’s because you’ve forgotten the lusciousness of the Autism Zen Zone.
Forgotten?
Don’t worry. You needed to develop your Alert system. We get that! But you can REST the alert system now. It’s safe to do so. You can recover the experience of the Autism Zen Zone. It’s like basking in warm sunshine, it’s like bathing in chocolate, it’s like all the drugs you wished you’d been able to lay your hands on as a kid… and better. It’s natural ayahuasca. It’s the peace of all nations. And it’s available to you in spades because of your glorious neural wiring…
…If… if… you can bear the idea of ‘ease’. Because the upshot of becoming a regular resident in the Autism Zen Zone is… hang on to your hats… greater ease in life.
Oh… oh my gentle heart… A question: Is this the next project?? Studying Zen? Like the Peak project took me to the Tao Te Ching?? Oh my sweet life. I would absolutely love that. What an honour too, to be found ready for such practices. I feel teary…
May I, may I find a text?
Of course!
Ayudame…
https://www.zen-azi.org/en/reading-suggestions …
What’s available as a pdf? …
Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind, Shunryu Suzuki, 1973, Weatherhill. (pdf)
A collection of teachings from talks given by Zen Master Shunryu Suzuki transmitting the essence of Soto Zen in a modern language, accessible to all.
- Preface, by Huston Smith 9
- Introduction, by Richard Baker 13
- Prologue: Beginner’s Mind 21
- PART I: RIGHT PRACTIC E
- Posture 25
- Breathing 29
- Control 31
- Mind Waves 34
- Mind Weeds 36
- The Marrow of Zen 38
- No Dualism 41
- Bowing 43
- Nothing Special 46
- PART 2: RIGHT ATTITUDE
- Single-minded Way 53
- Repetition 55
- Zen and Excitement 57
- Right Effort 59
- No Trace 62
- God Giving 65
- Mistakes in Practice 71
- Limiting You r Activity 75
- Study Yourself 76
- T o Polish a Tile 80
- Constancy 83
- Communication 86
- Negative and Positive 90
- Nirvana , the Waterfall 92
- PART 3: RIGHT UNDERSTANDING
- Traditional Zen Spirit 99
- Transiency 102
- The Quality of Being 104
- Naturalness 107
- Emptiness 110
- Readiness, Mindfulness 113
- Believing in Nothing 1 16
- Attachment, Non-attachment iit
- Calmness 121
- Experience, Not Philosophy 123
- Original Buddhism 12S
- Beyond Consciousness l27
- Buddha’s Enlightenment 131
- Epilogue : Zen Mind 133
Well. I think (non-think) we shall start here then.
Excellent. Thank you.
Just this second, an old Note From Higher Self popped up on my screen as a notification:
I am blessed by God when I sit very still.
Ha. Perfect.
Good work, oh very dear soul with the capacity for immense, deep, ravishing, luscious diving in to special interests.
I just realised. Is this why this project is called ‘Private’? Because the Autism Zen Zone is private? Like the Mental Stage, well-directed with a great play, is a private space?
Maybe… Yes.
Enter your own private Autism Zen Zone (for Ease)
