Peak 38: I am a completer completing

iPrefer:

  • iPrefer to do my exercise in the morning
  • iPrefer to have eggs and greens for breakfast
  • iPrefer to have breakfast as brunch, mid-morning
  • iPrefer to do my QT and then my meditation
  • iPrefer to use an app for meditation (Waking Up)
  • iPrefer to follow my preferences instead of being an eternal chameleon fitting in with what I perceive to be others’ preferences, and thus denying my own true personhood.
  • iPrefer to have a gentle morning of attending to personal life, and then a focussed working afternoon.
  • iPrefer to start significant activities on the hour, or half past. ?
  • iPrefer to listen to channels while I cycle
  • iPrefer to deal with my executive functioning lapses by… starting again on the hour / playing Switch20 / melting in some reframing / lowering the bar
  • iPrefer to limit myself to 4 hours seated computer/phone time per day (excluding morning QT), as I get stress and trauma held in my body / hips / psoas muscle
  • iPrefer to cycle three times a week to get the trauma and stress out of my body
  • iPrefer to tidy as I go if I can

What else should I know about my preferences?

They feel soft.

iPrefer not to go to work today… That’s nice and soft…

How about, ‘iPrefer to overcome my anxiety about work today by…’

Avoiding it.

Or..?

Feeling on top of it. By getting ready, reading through my training slides for the session I’m delivering… Getting there early. Supporting myself to feel soothed. Ah, yes… Self-soothing strategies.

Yes! iPrefer and Self-Soothing go hand in hand. How best can you self-soothe now?

Yeah… by being and feeling prepared. My executive functioning freezes when I feel anxious. (=> PDA) Keeping the old exec functioning going so I don’t need to rush and turbo-charge sounds good. One step in front of the other. It’s still early. One step, two step. Target: “I am prepared.”

iPrefer to feel prepared for what’s ahead.

But also I’m a perfectionist and a reflector so I delay completion.

But the word ‘completion’ gives you a sense of relief, doesn’t it. Are you aware in each moment of what you are working to complete?

Sometimes.

Do you notice when you have completed the task?

Often I’m on to the next thing…

Which is maybe why your tasks seem never-ending…

How better can I mark completion so that I get that sense of satisfaction, relief and increased confidence in my ability to complete whatever I next need to work on?

Acts of anchoring moments of ‘completion’ can benefit from small rituals.

Today I would like to develop my small ritual of completion… Ok.. It goes like this:

Hands clasped together; forefingers joined in pointing; mark the moment with a sense of appreciation and the words, “It is complete.”

I am a completer.

Indeed. Let that be the basis phrase of your day. Remember to affirm your present action: completing. Remember that strong, clear thoughts override default (troubling, troublesome, troubled) thoughts. Strong thoughts well-stated imprint on your reality powerfully.

I know this to be true because just now, having received the message about do/complete loud and clear, instead of standing up to go for my shower, I slid onto my phone, drifted into opening the iPlayer app, and found myself sneaking a peak at info on series 2 of the very scary Killing Eve. As my eyes resting on the first stomach-clenching thumbnail picture with the line ‘Eve is in Villaneuve’s flat’, an almighty ‘whoomph!!’ behind me made me jump out of my skin. I flew round in my chair to see a pigeon flying away, clearly having flown into the window a foot behind me. Did my fearful thinking simultaneously attract a highly fear-inducing experience into my reality?

Thought => Reality.

Ok… I can choose my thoughts wisely…

Strong thoughts well-stated imprint on your reality powerfully.

And my clearly stated thought is this:

I am a completer, completing.

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