Peak 71: I am true to reality

If I am ‘intertwined with Spirit’, as a natural factor of being a human, what are the ways I can bring this fact better to my daily awareness?

1. Ask this question out loud and sit and wait and settle and listen for a bit…

“If I am ‘intertwined with Spirit’, as a natural factor of being a human, what are the ways I can bring this fact better to my daily awareness?”

… … …

… Oh, I see. In reality, to sense this intertwining, one sure way is simply to “sit and wait and settle and listen for a bit…” 🙂  Then our senses start to attune, don’t they? Nice. Ok, oh… I’ve lost you…. Let’s go to our reading for today.

-7- Heaven and earth last forever. The reason why heaven and earth last forever is that they do not live for themselves. Hence, they last forever. Therefore, the True Person leaves self behind and thus is found in front, is not guarded and thus is preserved, is self-free and thus is able to find fulfilment. (Ref)

Oh, yes – this wonderful conundrum of our finding true personal fulfilment when we leave our personhood (if that’s an accurate interpretation of ‘self’) behind. It goes against alllll we’re taught in school/life/business which basically goes something like: hoe your own row and grab your own harvest, and guzzle it. My feeling is that it takes such TRUST, such FAITH in the universe, in ourselves, in others, to take a true leap into living not for ourselves but for others.

But look at the promised consequences: ‘last forever’, ‘found in front’, ‘preserved’…

Exactly the double conundrum! You can’t embrace selflessness to win those gains..!

You fleetingly had a different insight. What was it? 

Yes, as I wrote ‘selflessness’ I saw the actual quote was ‘self-free‘. That’s different, isn’t it? Selflessness infers a conscious denial of self for another/others. ‘Self-free’ or ‘leaving self behind’ infers… a kind of nakedness, unmaskedness, ‘unguardedness’.

What does it actually mean to ‘leave self behind’ or not to live for oneself?

The self is afraid of its own mortality. It insists on a clique of bodyguards – like a superstar afraid of her own success and the attention it has brought her. 

The self would win the match, top the charts, get preferential treatment, be called up first, be offered the best seat at the table. 

The self fears demotion, being ignored, being overlooked, being demeaned. 

The self works hard, efforts, paddles ferociously under the water, push-push-pushes… because its success feels so awfully temporary and under threat of extinction.

When we live for our self, we – the person behind the self – become the servant of the self. We are its workhorse, its bodyguard, its PA, its cleaner, its fixer, its spin doctor, its lawyer and its apologist. 

When we leave self behind, or decide not to live for our self, we are freed to experience life as the person without ‘a place at the table’. We are not defined against the ‘next person’. We are not drafted into defending our self’s whims. 

So, hang on, is the ‘self’ the ego?

It is the human/outward manifestation of the ego. The self is the person driven by the ego. 

So a person not driven by the ego is…?

A pariah.


You did ask. A person truly free from ego is the laughing ‘madman’ on the street, the jester-fool at court, the unwelcome truth-teller at the party, the Christ upon the cross…

Shucks, man. Heavy duty. Soften this for me.

‘The True Person’: this is the term Lao Tzu uses in your translation. Let’s work with that. What does ‘true’ mean to you?

To me, ‘true’ means honest, authentic, unornamented, direct (like an arrow is true), hitting its mark (ditto), aligned…

There we are. ‘Leaving the self behind’ allows a person to be more honest, authentic, unornamented, direct; to hit her mark; to be aligned. 

What would this look like in my daily life?

Contradictions resolved. 

Argh! Don’t make me resolve my contradictions! Hahaha…! Ok. So. What contradictions?

Posh/poor. Business/spirit. Detached/attached. Hermit/lover of people. Introvert/extrovert. Masker/truth-teller. Disabled/abled. Healing/healed. Teacher/student. Shame/acceptance. Confidence/fear. 

Oh my word.. stop! Give a girl some privacy!

Angels/intellect. Person-power/spirit-power. God/No-God. 

Oh, my heart… Ssh! I get it. Yes, this binary life is exhausting. The secrets! But also the wisdom in the secrets. You’ve gotta be brave to speak this stuff. Look at my adored Marianne Williamson getting hauled across coals out there on the political stage – what true sacrifice and spiritual courage. She’s putting spiritual discourse into US politics. And yes, people are laughing. And they literally simply left her out of the Vogue front cover of ‘all’ the Democrat women running for President. And yes, she’s opening up the cracks… Will she be rewarded for her work? No. Will she ever recover from this? Maybe not… Who knows? I’m so proud of her.

She’s speaking truth to power. 

What even does that actually mean?

Power is the ultimate reward of a self-driven life. Marianne Williamson is leaving self behind and taking the journey into the power fields nonetheless, to speak of what she knows. 

Hence, ‘pariah’.

Hence ‘pariah’. 

Brave, beautiful soul.

Alrighty, then. Good. Chat. What shall I take forward today?

The theme of being ‘true’. Consider  now the line: ‘I am being true to my self.’

Eek, is that about being a servant/slave/apologist/PA to our egoic drivers?

Maybe. Now complete this line: ‘The True Person is true to…’

Ooh. Um. Let me work with that a sec… [Goes to the loo and for a walk round the garden…]

‘The True Person is true to…’

  • reality
  • the moment
  • whatever arises
  • the Now
  • her values
  • her higher self

Those are my thoughts… Yours?

‘The True Person is true to reality.’ This allows her to be observant, watchful, responsive, authentic, unplanned, measured, respectful of what is unfolding around her. It stops her from imposing her self upon ‘what is’. 

Oh, beautiful Spirit of peace, unity, love and light. May I be a person who is found ‘true to reality’. May I learn truth and an unguarded presence to it. May I allow ‘what is’ to arise around me, and may I experience reality without trying to bend it, flee from it or reject it. Instead may I respond to its invitation, graciously, gratefully, and with curiosity and ‘happy serenity’. May we all see truth more clearly; may reality rest more comfortably with us all.

I am true to reality


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