The DOER model is good. You need to start with identifying the ‘undecided‘ thing (the problem, the conundrum, the stalled thing, the thing undone) – so the model almost becomes ‘uDOER’, which I kind of like too… As in ‘Go you, you doer!”
Yesterday, I tried the model out on the task of ‘going to the tip’, which is something I was undecided about, and I hate doing.
- Undecided: go to the tip? [All the variables, and the need for time on other things….]
- Decided: I shall go to the tip because… [rationale for decision, which I could refer to later]
- Organise: list of task steps and timings and considerations
- Execute: this was a rollercoaster and I felt uncomfortable/sad/distressed along the way – really important to remember that the bodymind is often not convinced this decision is a good idea until it’s done – so it drags its feet and sends out amygdala alerts all the dang way…
- Results/repeat: Reflecting on the outcome was good and reassured me the Decision had been good! I sat down to repeat it with another bigger Undecided project, and… completely Avoided setting a Decision. Maybe I only have One Decision A Day in me? Better make it a good ‘un.
Today: the role of the parasympathetic nervous system (again)
I’ve spent this morning studying the PSNS again… Yesterday I was training in London (waking at 4.44am and leaving house at 5.30am) and today I am fried. My adrenals are on fire again, and my sleep was, again, short. I’m stuck on 6h30 sleep, no matter how tired I am…
I woke up knowing: this near-burnout is all because I’ve got stuck in the sympathetic state over past months. And the parasympathetic system is barely getting a look in. I’m stuck in ‘urgent!’ mode. And stopping actually feels edgy, like falling off a cliff. So I zone out, with screens and late nights. But I don’t get proper ‘rest and digest’ time. My brain is always on. I’m super vigilant. I’m always communicating with someone or some idea, and for an aspie person that means the Theory of Mind turbo chargers are on…. It’s all out of whack.
This video explains why the Sympathetic and Parasympathetic Nervous Systems are like Holmes and Watson… they are intertwined. And the SNS is the one that has a quicker take up rate in any given instance:
And this sympathetic dominance in me is also why I am not losing weight, but rather am inflamed and bloated. So…
DECISION OF THE DAY: I commit to getting back into the parasympathetic state frequently, so that I am no longer SNS dominant. In fact, I want to be PSNS dominant.
ORGANISE: I know the best asset here is QIGONG. It is moving meditation, it is exercise, it is sleep-hygiene personified, it regularises the cranio-sacral nerves (including the vagus) that make up the PSNS; it massages and calms the spinal nerves that make up the SNS. I commit, with my heart, body and soul, to practice qigong each day this month. I will track it on my tracker.
EXECUTE: I call on my higher self to support me to ‘Execute’ this commitment even when I am doubting, feeling too tired, feeling like I don’t have time, feeling uninspired.
RESULTS: What results am I anticipating? A calmed parasympathetic nervous system. This qigong practice will be my foundation.
Deep breath here… Slow down again. *sings* ‘Slow down, you move too fast… Feeling groovy.’
Yes, feeling groovy is being in the PSNS state.
Which you’re not just now, eh?
Nope… I wired and fired, fried and wide-eyed… 🙁 Exhausted. Adrenals pumping and swollen in my back… Worried for my health…
Ok, there we are. Good. Well done for saying that. Yes, this is about healing with thoughts, emotional release, poise, intention… This is a great opportunity to learn about holding the PSNS state even in the company of another…
This is my concern! Living in companionship with someone – how does one ever get the ‘silent retreat’ and recuperate the PSNS state? How does one avoid becoming taut, and ‘not the person one once was’? Will I have a character change moving in with my beloved G?!
Sweet one, living alone, you have not been entering silent retreat! You have been screen locked and switched to “On” mode for months… You will find it easier to enter silent retreat in the loving physical company of one who is also naturally a retreatant in their day to day mode, as indeed you were for a while when you were in your best ANS homeostasis… When was that you say? Early 2017. Yes, it was the state which brought you and G into vibrational alignment to meet. Trust in that.
You have reminded yourself of the key tool: qigong. Worry yourself not further here. Pause. Breathe. Go and ‘execute’ the Decision of the Day.
What is the message for my day though?
‘I am entering the parasympathetic state.’ Remember what Eliza said? It takes but one mindful breath to enter the parasympathetic state. You can come back to that one mindful breath time and time and time again across the day.
Don’t even worry about meditation at this point. You are too mentally wired, and carrying too much psoas stress, to do seated meditation at the moment. But qigong simultaneously overrides and heals both those difficulties for you… It’s astonishingly powerful. Hence Chris Shelton’s tagline: ‘simple practice, profound results.’ So go do it. Relax. And get on with your day. TRUST the qigong to return you to your restful, no-crisis-now, peaceful, vagally-calming, cranio-sacrally settled, parasympathetic state.
I am entering the parasympathetic state.