Private 9: Imagine everything working out beautifully

  • Phew! I’m on my way now.
  • Phew! I found somewhere to get some soup.
  • Phew! I did the scary training session.
  • Phew! I’m on the train.
  • Phew! I’ve sorted my papers for tomorrow’s work.
  • Phew! I’m in the hotel room.
  • Phew! I didn’t throw up [upset stomach in the night]
  • Phew! I slept.
  • Phew! I’m dressed and ready.
  • Phew! We’ve interviewed twenty people for the research project!

What I love about the ‘Phew! First’ approach is the building, accumulating, burgeoning, relieving sense of Having Got Stuff Done. What’s the opposite? It’s jumping hurdles without acknowledging the achievement because at the very point of leaping, one is already only focussed on The Next Hurdle. And then what happens? You never get to complete the Stress Response Cycle! And then your body tenses up at the thought of Tasks, because they seem un-fricking-ending, relentless and like a ceaseless punishment with no release, or reward. 

Tough stuff! And great, awesome breakthroughs! It’s as if you are learning to rewire your brain towards relief, reward and ‘learned optimism’. 

Learned optimism. Great idea.

Learned Optimism is a super-power, a magic muscle. Can you imagine, can you imagine, can you imagine… everything working out BEAUTIFULLY? 

Ha! Tbh, sometimes I can, and sometimes I can’t. ‘Imagining’ takes some energy, doesn’t it? And the luxury of day-dreamy time…

Spot on. But it can also be about simply visualising options. Think of the TV programme, The Good Place – a euphemistic name for heaven. They also talk about The Bad Place and The Medium Place. So for any upcoming event or scenario, can you imagine, can you imagine, can you imagine…

  • The Bad Outcome
  • The Medium Outcome
  • The Good Outcome and…
  • The Beautiful Outcome!

Sure! Ok I have a colleague meeting this morning:

  • The Bad Outcome: we end up chatting about unrelated stuff, and I waste the morning, and then have to do the work myself anyway
  • The Medium Outcome: we get a bit confused, make some small decisions, and then I have to do the work myself anyway, a bit unsure if it’s what we agreed
  • The Good Outcome: we use the time to get super-clarity on what happens next
  • The Beautiful Outcome!: {The Good Outcome} plus we bond and inspire each other

Oh… Wow… That was a cool exercise! Talk about honing intention.

Learned optimism starts with simply visualising options and outcomes, and tapping into the felt sense behind each. How do you feel about each of your options above?

  • The Bad Outcome: cross, judgey, frustrated
  • The Medium Outcome: glum, worried, dumped upon
  • The Good Outcome: excited, positive, relieved
  • The Beautiful Outcome: moved, emotional!

Then, you’ve got the idea! Did you know you had the possibility for this morning’s meeting to be moving, emotional, inspiring, bonding? Can you lean into that possibility? 

Taking the optimistic view is a two part process: 

  1. Visualise it by using the Bad/Medium/Good/Beautiful Outcome procedure, including getting a ‘felt sense’ of each.
  2. Then, play with the felt sense and the detail of the Good and Beautiful Outcomes, gently, playfully. This is the Target Slide of Reality Transurfing.

Bring ease to this exercise, and continually back up your present moment moves with Phew!, so that you’re also in the present appreciating your self and ‘what is’, while visualising the beautiful outcomes. 

Ok. Cool. Thank you.

Imagine everything working out beautifully

PS. In my meeting, we got the Beautiful Outcome

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