While ‘downloading love into myself’ yesterday (a Saturday) and easing out of THINKING and into SENSING for that purpose, I came to a realisation:
‘THAT is why we [autistics] stim! To move out of THINKING and into the SENSING within which love downloads itself naturally in to us.’
My most blissed out states are I’m in stim mode. On the other hand, my (distressed) verbal tics erupt when I’m over-thinking.
For me, the working week is all about the over-thinking. Especially this last week, as I’ve been hustling to breathe life into my Covid-capsized business. So much over-thinking. So much masking… So much wanting to do these little incoming jobs right…
It was hard to relax as I lay out on the lawn, in the beautiful sunshine (it’s been sunshine central allllll of Lockdown). I suddenly had an idea – a concept, a ruse.
What if ‘they’ said,
“We’re turning off the (your) simulator in a year’s time. The deal on our part: no illness and also, no one left grieving. And on your part: no communicating the news to anyone, or hedging your life with clever tricks, or giving up work or earning, or throwing away what you currently are in the hope you’ll dodge the reality. Carry on ‘as normal’. Your ‘profile’ for this life will be ‘tallied’ on the very last day – not as a competition or exam, but as a righteous celebration of this, your own, particular dalliance in the physical plane in the undertaking of your SAS-style soul training – aka human life. This wonderful stimulation will be switched off in a year. Game over! Enjoy your last year in this thing called Life: the exceptional, blessed, revelatory, accelerating physical Academy of the Soul!“
This somehow reached me in the way that other concepts haven’t. ‘Live each day as if it were your last’ irks me as I certainly wouldn’t be at work, I’d be with my loved ones! And, ‘imagine you’ll die in a year’ has me all worried about tragedy… But this turning off of the simulation which is the Academy of the Soul… it tickles me because it assumes this life is an exercise in consciousness.
If I had this news, and it was for real, what would happen to my perspective?
Well, the conclusion I came to yesterday, based on my recent intense studies of Abraham (whom I have loved and followed for over a decade – and still learn from like a delighted novice), is that I would want to find ways to Feel Good, all day every day!
I decided I would tune in to Feel Good FM.
Tuning in is the act of conscious creation. How did we tune in to TV channels on old tellies? We LOOKED AT THE PICTURE ON THE SCREEN, and we kept twiddling until we got the output that pleased us! If there was noise, interference or even a crystal clear programme that just displeased you, you kept twiddling – you kept tuning and retuning.
The same with old radios. Twiddle and tweak, twiddle and tweak, until you got the programme you wanted.
Yes. Look at this!
So my Feel Good FM radio station stands for Feel Good Frequency Modulation?! I LOVE IT! May we all modulate our frequencies to the Feel Good broadcast!
Keep twiddling, keep finding what feels good, keep tweaking. It’s an inside job.
Right! Frequency modulation is an inside job. You can imagine the martyrs in fetid prisons, tuned into the bliss of communion; and compare them with the prince in the palace, tuned into his dissatisfaction and magnifying that frequency with every thought and action.
In life, I have tried to rearrange my external conditions, to give myself pleasure and the good feeling thoughts. I have lamented my conditions, as if doing so would impel me to take action to change them… But now, looking at the world from this moment. The external conditions, the shifts and occurrences, are so massive, looking at them as they are is enough to topple my heart!
Intense image: The bride, Emily, and father of the bride at a wedding in San Francisco in the #coronavirus era. [📷Vincens Forns] pic.twitter.com/GE40hwa4dA
— Steve Silberman (@stevesilberman) April 27, 2020
(https://twitter.com/stevesilberman/status/1254597243157405697?s=20)
Frequency modulation – twiddling, tweaking, tuning to your chosen programme – it’s an inside job. It’s a job that that never ends. As you get better and better at it, life conforms to the Feel Good programme you have expertly tuned to. It’s a comfort, at the very least, and an absolute bliss factory in its essential function. There is so much fun to be had with it! Look! Your Feel Good programme would like to provide you with an alternative and additional lockdown image:
London wildlife: pelicans on the deserted Mall 🐦👇🏼.#londonlockdown pic.twitter.com/vhK0ChGqe4
— Isabel Hunt (@isahunt) April 26, 2020
(https://twitter.com/Isabel_hunt710/status/1254319871153844226?s=20)
I like it. 🙂 What more do I need to know, to play with it today?
Yesterday you were using your thumb and forefinger as if miming tweaking a tiny tuning button. Excellent anchoring. Tune and tune and tweak and twiddle across the day.
I found a picture of the type of radio we had growing up!
The twiddling used to frustrate me!
Until you got the right channel, in which case the frustration dissipated, right?
Ha! Yes.
So, if you feeeeeeeeel frustration today, know that you are not yet tuned into the right channel. Twiddle and tweak. When you frequency modulate to Feel Good FM, you’ll know – and the frustration you felt will dissipate. It’s not the radio which is frustrating. The radio is an immaculate receiver using the laws of physics impeccably. It’s not the radio station causing frustration either. Feel Good FM broadcasts with an excellent signal wherever you are – and whatever (hear this), whatever is going on in your world. The slip between cup and lip sits with the tuner, the twiddler, the tweaker.
Become an expert tweaker, twiddler, tuner. That is the way to stay tuned in to Feel Good FM. What a great way to spend the last 365 days in the Life Simulator. That really is Level Expert, dear heart.
I feel quite emotional.
As well you might. These are giddily good emotions here at Feel Good FM! “Stay tuned in!”
Ha. Excellent. I’ve loved this. Thank you!
I am tuning in to Feel Good FM