Tag: Inner Balance

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Pivot 121: I am playing with ‘fun and done is better than perfect’

Reading: ACIM – felt drawn to start reading Teachers’ Manual. Let’s see how that goes..

Med – Inner Balance 15 min: HighCo 29% + AvCo 1.8 (!! It had been a while since I’d used the device – so startling to be so constantly out of coherence!!)

****

So here we are. Breathe deeply and anticipate satisfaction. I did that as I got out of bed this morning on this sunny day, and had a flashback to waking up happy in childhood during summer weekends or school holiday, simply anticipating a whole day of playing! We (me, siblings, neighbours) used to bike ride, hopscotch, explore the woods, play in the sandpit, play in the tree house, play make-believe games, dress up… Endlessly romping in a) our bodies and b) our imaginations. So satisfying!

Yesterday was a day of goosing up the satisfaction, and yes, a deep breathe before a new task does set you up to feel like there might well be – ooh, lovely – satisfaction ahead. And part of my real satisfaction came from introducing an element of playfulness yesterday.

  1. I was asked to do a video for my business for a online business festival I’m involved signed up to. Videoing myself reminded me of when I used to pretend to be Delia Smith talking to camera as I did baking in the kitchen at home as a child. I dropped seriousness / perfectionism and allowed myself to let it be a fun, easeful experience. (PS. This is the encouraging response I got from the event organiser, reassuring me that ‘fun and done’ is better than perfect: The one-minute perfect pitch – you should be on the dragon’s den! Or the Natwest Accelerator programme! Bravo!)
  2. I had a long list of complex tasks on a post-it note, all of which I needed to try and tackle in the afternoon. {Typically = *Executive function alert bells ahoy – which first?!, putting off the worst etc*} So, I grabbed some scissors and cut up the post it note and put the pieces in a mug. G. names this new game: Lucky Dip. Perfect. Pulling a random task out of a mug, time-stamping it and jumping into it was FUN. I got a lot done – but not all, and that was ok too.

We love your phrase ‘fun and done is better than perfect‘. You could run with that all day, all week, all year and get such satisfaction out of every day. 

I could, couldn’t I? It’s bringing the Facebook motto (done is better than perfect) together with my Mum’s legendary ‘It’s got to be fun’ motto. Yes, satisfying stuff.

My new routine is also about ‘fun and done’ isn’t it?

It sure is. You are creating an environment for yourself – thanks to the opportunity afforded you by lockdown – that allows you to have enough certainty, or scaffolding, in place, that for the remaining ‘moving parts’ of your day you still have mental energy for maximum creativity. 

Like Steve Jobs minimising his need for decision-making each day…

Yes. The scaffolding is all geared towards your wellbeing too, your MEDS. 

I could weep with joy and relief and appreciation for this journey…

So you know you are caring for your mind, body and soul with the scaffolding of your days – and it’s so well-designed that, should there be high winds or earthquakes, your structure can easefully move with the pressures. The rest of the day is for playful activity: the fun and done. Excellent work. 

Thank you! One quick question. Why was my heart coherence so out of sync today?

You want to know why? 

Yes.

Because you were in an egoic state about being or not being a ‘teacher of God’ after reading the ACIM Teachers’ Manual. Ease up on that stuff. You are ALL teachers of God because you are all extensions of Source Energy. Relax a little. The Manual simply says, ‘Dudes, try and show up in the world with your best shoes on.’ That’s all. It’s nothing special. ACIM is all about how nothing and no one is ‘special’. So chill. 

Haha. Truth bombing me all over the place. Thank you.

So today, play with ‘fun and done is better than perfect’ and see how much satisfaction and good-feeling is available to you, sweet soul. 

Thank you. x

I am playing with ‘fun and done is better than perfect’

 

 

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Pivot 112: I am putting on my neutral trainers and running the marathon of Unconditional Love 

Maybe, just maybe, the world is getting better. Maybe, just maybe, all is well. Maybe, just maybe, healing is occurring. Maybe, just maybe, we are purging old pains and traumas for the wellbeing of all…

It only takes for us to acknowledge the possibility, right?

7.20. Time to go inside. 

***15minInnerBalance- HighCoherence  79%- Av Coherence 2.9***

 

“I am neutral. If it’s polar, binary, contentious, I stand outside it and send love to all. Nature is neutral not polarised… I can stand in that. Love is neutral, I stand in that.” These are the thoughts that popped me into High Coherence. What do you say about neutrality, dear voice of my soul?

Neutrality is where it is at! You are right: love is all-encompassing, and nature too. Why, because Creation = Source = Love. 

And polarity?

Polarity comes from judgment. How exhausting it is to stand in judgment. How much brain power it takes. Judgment and Joy can not walk hand in hand. They are mutually excluding. It’s the one or the very other. Judgment is a ‘joy sponge’. 

But isn’t ‘good judgment’ part of just… growing up?

Initially, while the ego is strengthening itself. You however are on the cusp of the stage of life where you need to judge less, because you have seen that judgment exhausts the energy stores. You are invited to stand outside the circle of combat, and look on while holding that very circle in unconditional love. In other words, if you have energy to spare (and you do), spend it on holding others in unconditional love, rather than on judging them (for good or for ill). Your heart sinks as you waver between ‘agreeing with’ and ‘condemning’. Your brain’s machinations never give you a satisfactory answer. You are flick-flacking like a loose shutter banging in the dark of a windy night.

No judgment is needed in this day of the uprising of love. No judgment. Do not add to the polarisation with your half-hearted condemnations. If you have breath and brain energy to spare, put on your neutral trainers and run the marathon of Unconditional Love today. Now that is fitness training for you. 

Tysm. x

I am putting on my neutral trainers and running the marathon of Unconditional Love 

 

 

 

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Pivot 111: I am saying “Maybe”

It’s been nearly a week since I was last here. The work of sensing – and internally declaring ‘This is heaven on Earth!’ is powerful, beautiful stuff. Thank you for this. Thank you so much, wherever this is coming from. I’m so grateful. As the world unravels, I have a lens which tells me, ‘This is it – we are learning to creative – consciously or unconsciously…’

I’m working on a really tough case at the moment, in that my two clients are deeply disturbed and distressed by each others actions, and I am waking up in the night thinking of them. My adrenals are limping along… I am looking forward to connecting here. I need to hear you again and download whatever it is I need to receive to benefit from the lessons available to me now.

Ok. Time to settle in, go in, turn on the ‘receptive mode’, bypass head, enter heart, catch the waves of the invisible realm…

***InnerBalance15minMed-87%coherence and av.co3.7***

 

Sometimes it’s a case of trusting. In the process. In your skills. In your wisdom. But even more importantly, remembering to trust in their process, their skills, their wisdom. Stop trying to do the work for them, yes? 

That is so true. I do try and do the heavy lifting… Probably because I want to assure success for myself, I guess..?

No need for self-criticism, but yes, you are doing the heavy lifting. What you can do is continue to offer new information, new tools, new perspectives. People are learning new things all the time – to introduce alternative perspectives is fine. Just allow the person to take their own route downstream. You don’t know what the downstream route (of least resistance) is for the person – and nor do they necessarily… So just introduce the concept of eeeeeease. Bring some ease to the process with them. 

That’s helpful. I guess I sometimes wonder if I’m edging into psychotherapy… which is not my role.

This world is an Emotional Hospital. All beings are here to experience and modulate emotion. All beings are here to learn the meaning of emotions – their own and others. None are exempt. If you feel you are speaking out of turn, you can cease – but remember, questions are merely invitations to introspection, and without introspection it is hard to leave conflict behind. 

Is there anything else you think I should bring to my practice?

Boundaries are key. You know when you are ‘out of bounds’ when you feel tight and taut. You know when someone has traversed your boundaries when… you sense your eyes rolling – you are in judgement of them and that is not fair on them. So make your boundaries clear, and do not let others stumble over them, for the good of all. 

And what would be your advice to me for today? I’m frazzled physically already…

We say REST. Rest your eyes, your mind, your soul. You have been pushing. 

I know… I’m tired. I didn’t stop over the weekend… (Went to see my folks for the first time since early March! In their new house  – they moved house during lockdown!) I shall aim to gather qi. That will help me reestablish healthy boundaries too.

I sense you’ve something else to say.

It is not our intention to instruct however we see something we think you could improve on. Where you see disunity, see unity. 

Sorry?

Where you see disunity (anger, offence, intolerance, injustice, corruption), see unity (happiness, understanding, equity, justice, trustworthiness). 

How?

With your will. Every time you lay your eyes on images of fascism, racism, bigotry (feel the tug inside you when we say those words? They are magnetic..) use your mind to create an alternative image. This is the proper use of will, imagination and visualisation. 

Remember how we talked about stopping and switching from the UNWANTED to the WANTED? Now we are talking about making the INVISIBLE VISIBLE. What does this mean? It means this: 

What is VISIBLE to you is the result of ‘yesterday’s thinking’. Your thinking today is creating the future reality of tomorrow, so think with care, using your ‘sifting and sorting’ through CONTRAST (yes/no, good/bad, wanted/unwanted) to prompt conscious creation or what Abraham would call, Deliberate Creation.

If what is visible is PLEASING to you, magnify it. 

If what is visible is NOT PLEASING, then replace it with the visualisation of its opposite or improved alternative. 

This is a subtle and powerful technique.

Think of something you have seen which is NOT PLEASING. 

Ok. Easy:

https://twitter.com/DawkinsReturns/status/1275249854445387776

(https://twitter.com/DawkinsReturns/status/1275249854445387776)

Can you ‘pivot’ this? 

I can…………… I suppose….. Hang on. Let me take a mo… I’m not sure if the pleasing alternative is:

  • a plane flying a BLM banner or
  • a plane dropping something neutral – love hearts, £5 notes, messages of kindness or
  • or just an empty blue sky…

Help me here.

What do you suppose actually ‘happened’ in that moment of the plane flying by? 

Intense emotional reactions from all that saw it, whether of joy, pride, awe, or wrath, judgement, horror, or mirth, amusement, scandal….

Exactly. So now, think again about the pivot. 

In the pivoted alternative, there was an event where … no intense emotions were felt. No – there was an event and it did not produce POLAR emotions (Yes!/No!).

We are getting much closer now. How about: there was an event and people were neutral or balanced as a result. Now this is either because the event was ‘less inflammatory’ or because the people were more assured of themselves, less easily swept up. In other words, can you imagine a world where there was coherence – just like your mind state enters when you land on ‘heart coherence’? Can you use your reaction against the ‘displeasing’ thought to prompt yourself to work on seeing a world that is more united, loving, considerate, assured, collective, peaceful…

I see a see-saw that shifts from ‘very long’ with a big bump at each end, to a shorter/lower version of the original.

Yes. The polarity becomes less extreme. Excellent.

Now, where does such a concept begin? 

Arghghghgh…. Ehem. *brightly* In me.

Yes. So, rather than throwing yourself to one end or other of any see-saw, make your see-saw ever shorter/lower – and constantly ‘calibrate’ (a little more, a little less) to keep your seesaw almost at neutral. 

Aha! I get it… Yes. Almost at neutral. Keep a more calibrated outlook. It’s not to say things out there don’t matter. Oh man… It’s to say that internally, I am calibrating my response, so I don’t lurch out on either Goodeeee! or Baddieee! All that I see, I respond to with a balanced eye. When I see something displeasing, I don’t chase it down and magnify it, I use my mind to switch to the preferred alternative in my MIND. Once I’ve visualised it, I let the displeasing thing go. Thus, displeasing things are something I can be even grateful for – as I take them as PROMPTS to visualise (ie create) the PREFERRED FUTURE ALTERNATIVE.

How shall I remember this today?

The word ‘Maybe’ is a great calibrator. It gives ease, breathing space, possibility, time, and the invitation to let the ‘invisible world’ intervene, as Alberto Villoldo might say. 

Can we talk about the invisible world?

Maybe… 

Ha. Very good. Ok.

May. Be. It may / be. I see. So much possibility there, especially if I am leaning in to softness, optimism, confidence, faith, trust…

Yes, may be. 

It’s slippery though, eh? Empheral. You can’t get a handle on it.

That’s the idea. To get comfortable with the absolute (ha!) mutability of all things. If all things are mutable, and they are, then there is simply nothing, no-thing, to be worried about. Simply create the wanted out of the embers of the unwanted. 

Ok. Maybe that’s it… Ty. x

I am saying “Maybe” #seesawcalibration 

*****

Pivot = ‘Maybe love is round the corner… Maybe. Just maybe.’

 

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Pivot 100: I am envisaging our harmonious future

Wow. 100 posts.

Let me tell you about my work of yesterday, replacing ‘attack thoughts’ with ‘thoughts of love in the Neutral Now’.

It was such a good practice. Basically, spotting the attack thoughts is the key first element of course, but I’m becoming more sensitised to incoherence of the Heart thanks to the Inner Balance machine, so I was pretty quick to spot the clenching in my chest.  Also, the revving up to vaunt about my ‘clever, hot take’ is a good indicator that I’m having an attack thought. Overall, it’s clearly an egoic Head response. So then, you sink in to the Heart space… and the heart ALWAYS has a softer perspective.

And you know what, this practice is NOT about failing to turn to see ‘what’s happening’ in the world. It’s about using the spotting of difficult things as a prompt to direct thoughts lovingly. Here are some examples, some of which are very simple or apparently ‘trivial’, but it’s the practice of channeling the attack thought into a loving thought:

  1. I’m giving up attack thoughts about this lamp which just fell on my head => <3 ‘Most of the time it’s a very good lamp.’
  2. I’m giving up attack thoughts about my overdue work which I’ve got to do this weekend => <3 ‘I’ll be fine. I’ll know when to do it, and it’ll be good.’
  3. I’m giving up attack thoughts about Dominic Cummings and the UK government => <3 Wishing the evolution of consciousness for all
  4. I’m giving up attack thoughts about this huge spider rocking a trapped fly to death   => <3  ‘It’s nothing to do with me. I’ll leave nature be.’
  5. I’m giving up attack thoughts about Dominic Cummings and the UK government – again   => <3 Love for all the families and key workers affected by corona virus. Gentle love to all. 
  6. I’m giving up attack thoughts about US police attacking protesters   => <3 Love for all the families caught up in this; soft prayerfulness for the bereaved family of George Floyd.

And the effect? Less exhaustion. Less chafing. Less yo-yoing. More peace in my Heart. An understanding of how to respond to what is seen, in a productive loving way, without using the pain or error of others as an excuse for me to spin in to egoic reaction. My love and my neutrality are my vibrational offering to this complex reality I think I see.

Good work. Really good work. 

You see – there’s this…

https://twitter.com/JordanUhl/status/1266917228752056320

Which is also about this…

My heart is hurting for us all, truth be told.

**15minInnerBalanceMed – 85% high coherence; 3.7 av coherence***

This was a good practice. How? With these thoughts:

“Oh! What’s occurring? I’m breathing in to my heart space, and now I’m breathing out. My heart’s inflating like a big red balloon. I’m loving myself with oxygen. Ooh, memories of our 9 mile walk yesterday… Landscapes rolling ahead of us, bathed in sunshine. G smiling – at me. “

Every time I thought about ‘what’s going on in the world’, my heart coherence dropped out on the IB app – within the millisecond.

In other words, you can not hold thoughts of disunity, fear, sadness or loss, and simultaneously be in a state of heart love. How does that knowing make you feel? 

Astounded, really… because it calls on us to take such a different approach to responding to what we see in the world. It’s such an ask.

It’s such an opportunity to learn about how to contribute at this time. Your frequency is your offering. Each one is a broadcasting antenna. Broadcast the message of peace, unity, love and light. Why do you think Gandhi spent full mornings in meditation before he set out for peaceful protest? To set his frequency to peace. It takes focus, dedication and practice to be both aware of injustice and disharmony, and simultaneously to pulsate to the frequency of justice and harmony. 

Sounds like vibrational mastery.

Exactly that. 

Some ACIM?

Sure. …..

Ok so I feel hesitant to share because the random selection was about God, and so was the second… and I’m hesitant to talk about God here, I realise. You know, now that this is open… Can we discuss this?

Great conversation topic. What would you like to say? 

I think, it’s been a while… And many of my beloved teachers seems to use different names. Like Source or Source Energy or Creator. I’m both shy to say God, and also sensing that even I – after all these years – still have a desire to say, ‘Yes, but not like God-as-bearded-man-in-the-sky.’ I’m listening to a lot of Gospel, and again, words are complex in this time… Oh it feels like an old conversation I moved past years ago.. And yet.

We are glad you brought this up. Part of the new paradigm involves a complete ‘pivot’ in what is meant by these words. It is imperative that now, right now, words are not a barrier to people’s journey towards love. However, there is a bump in the road when God is not referred to at all – or some other Source force term for that matter. You all need to know you are not alone. You all need to know there is powerful love for you, right here, right now. 

Source Force. I like that.

Well, run with that. 

I’m just thinking. Do I need to study ACIM again?

You could start teaching it… You are teaching it. You are teaching: have love for all things, starting with yourself. This is all that we are asking of you. And also… one small other matter: you are not alone. Do you have any sense of how much love is being directed at your planet at this time? Do you? Do you think this battle for ‘health over pandemic’, and ‘justice over police state’ is going unseen? Do you? 

No. I imagine it is not.

So your prayers for peace, do you think they are for nought? 

It takes faith, right?

It takes powerful presence. Sit tight and fast on your spot on the planet, anchored and grounded. Then, zoom your focus out in to the ether so that you can see the planet from outer space – and imagine your world absolutely swarming with beings of love who will filter out the hate. The uprising is about finding ways to unloose and release the hate and frustration. Let that occur. Release all that is there for the release. Settle in to what is to come. Your Michigan sheriff – he is the future revealing itself. Align with the future to come. As Abraham explains, your imperfect present is the manifestation of old thinking. Focus on your current thinking to create the future you wish to see. In fact, just remember, your current thinking is creating your future reality, so ease up on thinking about chaos. Think on your harmonious future. Be there. Be there. Be there. 

Ok. I’ll play it like a game, ok? Riffing on the harmonious future theme; goosing up my reading of ‘what’s occurring’ to see it more softly…

I am thinking on our harmonious future.

See, envision, envisage, sense the world you wish to experience. This is prayer. 

Oh… ok. Yes. Ty.

So when we say ‘think on’ we mean ‘envisage’. 

Got it. Amen.

I am envisaging our harmonious future

 

 

 

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Pivot 99: I am giving up attack thoughts, and thinking thoughts of love in the Neutral Now

It was going so well… I was relishing ‘focussing on the Bright Lighters’ in my world, all the way til almost bedtime.

I made a list of Bright Lighters that came in to my day:

  • Lee Holden, whose online qigong class I do every morning on the patio
  • Jacinda Arden (and other women leaders responding to Covid-19) Ref
  • My brother-in-law whose birthday it is today
  • My G who gleams
  • My adoring sis (adoring of all, and so loving to her vast tribe)
  • My noble bro (such astonishing qualities of nobility, strength and love)
  • My brave and doting Dad
  • All the invisible Bright Lighters
  • Rob Greenfield (environmental activist I’ve been watching)
  • My End of Life Doula UK colleagues – oh, man… beautiful souls
  • My darling AS, heartfully, wisely teaching me about the Karen meme and white privilege – as we discuss racial violence/hatred and events in NY city and Minneapolis
  • My beloved L, checking in tenderly on the family with such care, wit and warmth from her lockdown pod
  • The brilliant cast and writers of Gavin & Stacey which we’re watching through (I’d never seen it!)…

And then, just before bed, I thought I’d just briefly ‘check Twitter’. I glimpse what’s going on in Minneapolis where people are protesting the unspeakable murder of a black man named George Floyd by a police officer. A black CNN news reporter being arrested while reporting on live TV. A white guy in a gas mask and disguise, calmly smashing shop windows with a hammer near where people are protesting… hours after their ‘president’ wrote on Twitter, “When the looting starts the shooting starts.” And in London, a young pipsqueak of a white woman police officer (‘Karen’ + police powers) striding up to a black man in the street and cuffing him within 60 seconds for no good reason. Before I know it, I’m chucking my phone down and walking out the back door, saying “Evil, it’s pure evil. I can’t stand it.” – and sitting crying in the garden.

Help me out here. Do I look and bear witness? Or do I turn my eyes from this? The outrages of this world are unspeakable at the moment. The prevalence of hate, of prejudice, of greed are intolerable. QED from Forbes.com: Billionaires Are Getting Richer During The COVID-19 Pandemic While Most Americans Suffer.

And lest we think racial hatred and police brutality only overlap in the US, read this thread:

https://twitter.com/illh0eminati/status/1266441604170223617

Last night, after I’d turned my phone off in tearful protest, I plugged it in to charge, and it automatically started to turn itself back on, producing the familiar white screen and Apple symbol. And for the very first time I noticed the significance of the Apple with the bite taken out of it. What happened in the garden of Eden when Eve (huh!) took a bite from the apple from the Tree of Knowledge? The fall of humankind, arising from this one act of transgression, the original sin. And so here I am, and many others, looking at the world through machines labelled with the symbol of the original sin.

So… as Nessa would say, “O! What’s occurring?”

Hell? [ooooh typo alert! I meant…] Hello?

Spot on, dear soul. Is it hell, or is it heaven, here on Earth? 

Oh man… I know, we need to DECIDE and act accordingly… I’m just tired.

Stephen Jenkinson said in an interview recently, “After 65 harrowing years on this planet, I can say…” Life is harrowing.

We know. We know. 

Did you say, “We’ll leave you to it”?!

Calm… Reboot. There is much to discuss. You need your Heart in the right place to hear us. At the moment, you are tuned in to Chaos FM, and we are here trying to chat to you on Peace FM. Change frequency, and we will gladly discuss all these matters. And they do matter. 

Ok. I’ll do a meditation.

No, not yet. Not in this state. That’s like trying to jump on to the motorway in 2nd gear. Get up, get a drink, properly shake this state out for a bit. There’s no rush. We’re right here. 

k..

***15mInnerBalanceMed – High coherence 48% / Av coherence 2.4***

Wow, well I just sat helplessly in low/mod coherence for the first half of that! Amazing to see how my heart had locked into frazzle. What got me out of non-coherence eventually was:

  1. Getting my mind in to Neutral gear – not Reverse (ruminating on past) or 1st gear (nudging in to future planning) – just the Neutral Now (nice phrase)
  2. Repeating over, ‘Now I am breathing into my heart space; now I am breathing out of my heart space.”

So. Let’s see if I can tune in to Peace FM…

Try taking another random page from ACIM. 

Ok….

Holy moley… It could barely be more perfect for today. Ty.

Lesson 23 of A Course In Miracles
Lesson 23 of A Course In Miracles

Lesson 23: I can escape from the world I see by giving up attack thoughts.

…3. The world you see is a vengeful world, and everything in it is a symbol of vengeance. Each of your perceptions of “external reality” is a pictorial representation of your own attack thoughts. One can well ask if this can be called seeing. Is not fantasy a better word for such a process, and hallucination a more appropriate term for the result? 4. You see the world that you have made, but you do not see yourself as the image maker. You cannot be saved from the world, but you can escape from its cause. This is what salvation means, for where is the world you see when its cause is gone? 5. … As you look about you, repeat the idea slowly to yourself first, and then close your eyes and devote about a minute to searching your mind for as many attack thoughts as occur to you. As each one crosses your mind say:

I can escape from the world I see by giving up attack thoughts about _________.

Hold each attack thought in mind as you say this, and then dismiss that thought and go on to the next.

I read ACIM through in 2009-2014. It changed my life. I had forgotten some of its principles. This is good revision for me right now. Thank you.

You will be startled at the power of your focus when you recall yourself to be the subjective hallucinator, not the observer of some objective reality. 

Just now, on your break, you spotted a rabbit bounding out of the woods. You picked up the binoculars from the kitchen table, and watched the rabbit as it sat munching grass in the sunshine. Suddenly, the focus of your attention was not ‘the kitchen’ with its washing up to do and the busyness of domestic life; the focus of your attention was ‘rabbit in sunshine’. In other words, through an act of shifting your gaze and magnifying the sweet object of your attention, your present moment reality shifted in to ‘pure innocence’. 

This is the purpose of A Course in Miracles – to help you learn to shift your entire gaze/reality from vengeance/lamentation/binary to forgiveness/appreciation/neutrality. That’s all. It’s a return to innocence. 

You are currently offering yourself many opportunities to flex this ‘muscle’ of perspective-taking, without feeling you are abandoning the ’cause’. 

You noticed the self-styled Environmentalist Activist. We are not suggesting you become passive, but we are suggesting you become passivist. 

Do you mean pacifist? Peace activist? Which one here? https://philosophynow.org/issues/105/Pacifism_Is_Not_Passivism

In truth dear soul, we are suggesting ‘passivist’. Where your ‘pacifist’ definition means ‘anti-war’, we mean passivist. Where you ‘pacifist’ definition means peace-loving, we may mean pacifist – but largely, you confuse ‘pacifism’ with reacting against something.

The principle is this: when you are anti- anything, you are growing that thing by your attack thoughts. When you are pro- anything, and able to bring loving appreciation to that Wanted without having thoughts of attack upon those who do not concur with you, you are achieving a miracle. So we say, notice and dismiss your attack thoughts first. Magnify the ‘rabbits in sunshine’, second. Third… see how your reality transmogrifies. 

Ok. But this: I can escape from the world I see by giving up attack thoughts about _________. I think some dear to me would challenge the righteousness of ‘escaping the world I see’ when I have the ‘privilege’ to just turn off Twitter and live a good life. 

Trust us. You need to step in to Heart-centred living. That is the basis of the Pivot. You have seen today, with an actual biofeedback machine, that when you focus on ‘the world you [think you] see’ out there, you see hell, and your heart gets locked in to incoherence. (Reread The Power of Now if you need to.) We need you in coherence – this is the part you are being asked to play. You. And others of course. But not all – and that is not for you to worry about. Or be perplexed about. You personally are not called to be a Journalist. You are called upon to be a Journaller: that is an internal journalist. So go inside. Report what is there. Accept the invitation to inhabit the ‘calm interiorised mind’.

The monks ‘escaped’ to the monastery for a reason: to be able to pray for the world without being knocked sideways by the ‘reality’ of it. Today, we are asked to level up by being in the world without being knocked sideways by the ‘reality’ of it. You do that by finding the peace inside of you – by finding the monastery inside your own self. And resting there. You want an act of activism? This is it. 

Radical Love means so much to love the world that you endeavour to live within the potential of its pure positive peace, rather than to add to its challenges by resonating with fear or anger about its apparent disunity. You will see the Unity of humanity, and its power to Love, and you will do this as an act of service. Drop your thoughts of attack, precious soul. They come only from the blessed egoic mind. Introduce the language of the Heart to your days – and learn only to give airtime to the thoughts of pure positive wellbeing. That which we broadcast we disseminate. Think thoughts of love, you radical being. 

I am giving up attack thoughts, and thinking thoughts of love in the Neutral Now

 

 

 

 

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Pivot 98: I am focussing on the Bright Lighters

Well I can tell you, ‘tending to my attention’, and managing to bring neutrality to my awareness of ‘the news’ had an unexpected result: it gave me a sense of dignity.

I realised across the day, how very much I’d become accustomed to hurling myself at hoovering up the news about the rights and wrongs of politicians. It all started with Brexit – when for years I couldn’t take my eyes off it on Twitter, because I so wanted to spot signs that Brexit was going to be annulled somehow. Then with this Pandemic – what with this country having the highest mortality rate in Europe, I’ve been scanning the Twittersphere to find signs that we were responding effectively at last. Not to mention all the other stuff I’ve read about behind the scenes shenanigans.

Well, enough.

I take my energy back. I take my attention back. I will place it where I see the signs of PULL emerging in this world. And magnify that.

That truly is the best response you can give to these times. In fact, it might be helpful to know that the higher the opportunity for PULL’s emergence in the world, the more explicitly and rampant will run its ‘opposite’… for a while. Here is the test.

Can you, individually and collectively, place your powerfully magnifying attention on what is wanted rather than what is not wanted? 

Sounds simple? It’s advanced level consciousness, right here, right now. It feels ‘right’ to resonate with and rail against the Unwanted – because you think that pointing to the Unwanted will make it go away. Equally, you believe that if you (jointly and severally) don’t point to it, no one else will see it. It feels like a civic duty to highlight the Unwanted. It feels like an act of love. And we know, it comes from a place of love to point out the injustices, the brutalities, the hatreds, the cheats, the under-cutters, the overpowerers. We know, and that is understood. 

But know that as you shine your magnifying glass on the Unwanted, you give it energy, you give it power to grow. 

Can you trust – and we get it, it’s an act of huge faith in these bifurcated, polarised times – but can you trust that if you magnify the love, the selflessness, the new role models, the united collaborators, the wise ones, the enlightened communities, the compassionate innovations… you will help the Wanted to grow?

“Oh, but when I point to the Unwanted, I feel alive! It’s so visceral – I know I’m making a difference!” you say. 

And to this we say: Get used to the peacefulness of the paradigm you are headed towards. Do not mistake it for the land of Nothing Doing. Your greatest service to your self and to others at this time, is to learn to resonate in peace. Sure, we get it, fire crackers and electric shocks are tantalising in a physical world. But know that the frequency of peace is subtle. And its fruits are boundless. When you truly can ease in to that peace paradigm, you will start to see the plants growing and the birds communicating – and the wonder of that (and so much more) will bring you to your knees. And in time, people will pause from tasering each other emotionally, and ask you – the Peace Freqs – what you are doing. And you will start to show them. 

Time for practice. 

***15minInnerBalanceMeditation – 87% high co – 3.6 av coherence***

 

That’s more like it. 🙂 I Imagined my heart inflating and deflating like a bright heart-shaped balloon as I breathed. Lovely.

Open the letter. 

Ok. [Yesterday, I pulled out my beloved copy of A Course in Miracles (ACIM), and spotted inside it a letter I had apparently written and posted to myself in 2016!]

….

Oh wow! It was a letter we wrote to ourselves at the end of the Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy Course – and the teacher posted it to us 6 months later. It starts,

“Dear Arabella,

I am writing this to you, dear soul, on the last session of JW’s MBCT Course. I hope this find you well, thriving, at peace {sic}, in flow and sensing the blessings of Life… ”

It’s really beautiful. I’ve put it back in the ACIM book.

And if you open ACIM book, just randomly, what does it say to you? 

Lesson 88

1. (75) The light has come.

In choosing salvation rather than attack, I merely choose to rec­ognize what is already there. Salvation is a decision made already. Attack and grievances are not there to choose. That is why I always choose between truth and illusion; between what is there and what is not. The light has come. I can but choose the light, for it has no alternative. It has replaced the darkness, and the darkness has gone.

2. These would prove useful forms for specific applications of this idea:

This cannot show me darkness, for the light has come.
The light in you is all that I would see, [name].
I would see in this only what is there.

Yes! This. This is the antidote to pointing out the Unwanted! In choosing salvation rather than attack, I merely choose to rec­ognize what is already there. It’s time for me to give up ‘attack and grievance’ against these people whose judgement and motives I’m so ready to lunge in to. I know what happens when I point to the ‘shocking’ and the ‘disgusting’ behaviour in others – especially  public figures. I feel clever. That’s the truth. I feel smart when I apply my brain to identifying, and evidencing the wrongs of others. I may not say out loud my attacks very much, but when I do share my apparent insights with others, I feel like the shiz. I get a kick out of it. 

What if I applied my brain with as much vigour to the Wanted as I’ve done to the Unwanted? What wonders I could achieve, in terms of highlighting the New, and the Peace Paradigm, and the Evolution of Consciousness…

Why have I allowed my brain’s attention to be ‘hijacked’ by a seeming circus show of my own illusioning? Enough. No more attack, no more grievance. This cannot show me darkness, for the light has come. The light in you is all that I would see, [name]. And now, to focus on the bright lighters. 

There we are. What a great phrase: ‘to focus on the bright lighters’!

Yes, why not? Look towards the light, right? Stop focusing on the dimly lit souls, and great special-interesty on the ones beaming brightly. Even if I feel less ‘clever’ in doing so! 😉

Yes! You know where the Bright Lighters are in your world. Focus on them. 

Today I’m on a refresher course on Advance Planning for End of Life. Run by a bunch of Bright Lighters.

Man, I’ve been focussing on those I’d see as Dark. a) ACIM reminds me they are not. b) What a waste of focus!

Have a brightly lit day! 

Ty.

I am focussing on the Bright Lighters

 

 

 

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Pivot 97: I am tending to my attention (#AttendToPULL)

I would almost feel happy to stay working with #IamRelishingWhatIs&WhatIsComing for ever more. It is an amazing door opener to all things coherent, appreciative and receptive. It is the answer to all my desires to move from Head to Heart: relishing happens in the heart sphere, with the mind engaged to support and magnify the moment.

Yesterday I relished so many simple things, present and coming – lingering and basking in the enjoyment of them. I relished:

  • qigong on the patio in the sun
  • a tidy pop-up desk ready for running my online training
  • bringing to mind the folks I’d be working with across the day
  • glimpsing the sight of peaceful people on my mindfulness zoom session
  • seeing my first HUMAN SOCIALLY since before lockdown – literally since 14th March – 10 weeks and 4 days ago! CM came up here and we walked round the woods, carefully socially distanced.
  • moments sitting in the garden during the working day and relishing the sun on my skin
  • contemplating the summer stretching onwards
  • telly with A and G – eating delicious home cooked food
  • {catching videos on Twitter of the #BooForBoris event, and appreciating the awareness of people’s active, collective response to what has been an unspeakable week in UK politics. You’d think from this blog that I’m unaware of politics. Actually I follow v closely, and my Head is frankly aghast – but I keep this space free of it. My heart knows better than to entangle itself…}

Meditation time…

***15minInnerBalanceMed – 44% high coherence – av. coherence 2.0***

Inner Balance screen shot Inner Balance screen shot

Man, that was a tough practice. Why?

Feeling the pressure of time. Feeling behind. Feeling rushed. Feeling you have a lot to squeeze in to the day. Feeling like you have a training session to run in two hours, and getting pumped up for that. 

I don’t want to feel pumped up for these sessions. That is zazz. I’m done with that. I wanted that feeling of coherence…. 🙁    So, today?

You can’t talk about politics here and then hope to get coherence. It doesn’t work like that. Not in these days. Your politicians are not acting for you, for peace, for collaboration, for unity, for selflessness. So don’t look at them. Seriously. We’re glad you brought your addiction to Twitter-gazing up here. Drop it. Seriously. If you truly want to ‘level up’ with coherence – by which we mean alignment to the grand What Is of increased consciousness – keep your eyes on the prize. Tend to your attention, as a farmer tends to the most fragile newborn lamb, or the horticulturist tends to the delicate seedlings. Tend to your attention. This means: check where you are placing your attention. Is it on peace, unity, love and light? Or is it on the apparent failings of your fellow humans. Their ‘failings’ are a gift for you in that you can practice your non-judgment, your neutrality, your capacity for universal forgiveness. Return to ACIM and remind yourself of its principles. 

If you will place your attention on those you see as doing wrong, you will need to be sure to practise the principles of forgiveness. As that is hard, we suggest instead you place your attention on that which is reminiscent of peace, unity, love and light. Do not fritter this special time away, chafing against the old which is collapsing. Turn your magnifying attention to the blossoming new. This takes care and focus, but the fruits are worth it, for you and for the all. Love all; have clear boundaries. Love all; have clear boundaries. This is sovereignty. Peace now. 

Ty. I am humbled, chastened. Yes, it was time we had that conversation…

I will tend to my attention. Good practice. Ty.

I am tending to my attention (#AttendToPULL)

 

 

 

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Pivot 96: I am relishing what is, and what is coming

Scene from the Generation Game gameshow

#ILoveWhat’sComing was a beautiful game to play! Endless opportunities to see the future coming towards us as a Generation Game conveyor belt of prizes…

Scene from the Generation Game gameshow

I noted a few of the ‘good things coming’ that came to mind when I put my Heart in Green zone / neutral and said…

#I love what’s coming: 

  • A week of connecting with people online
  • Being able to contribute to the #IPWOA
  • People articulating effectively together about our politics
  • Greater consensus in the UK about what is good for the common good
  • Alllll the good stuff I don’t even know about! 
  • Spending much more time in the Green HRV zone in the future – good for health, wealth and planet for us all
  • Mmmm… breakfast
  • Continuing to learn how to care for my wellbeing
  • A sandwich!
  • A walk on the hills we can see from our house 20 miles away – our first ‘drive + walk’ since Lockdown! 
  • Approx 1000 meals every year for the rest of my life!
  • All those birthdays ahead
  • Holidays and walks and outings to experience
  • Films I’ll watch

This ‘looking ahead to what’s coming’, and generating good feelings (coherence) in the present is a beautiful new step for me. It is the soft antidote to the tendency of my autistic brain to see the future as either dreadfully problematic or so undefined as to appear dull.

It’s hard to explain – as it may appear childish… But I have now seen that relishing and appreciating – past, present or future – is genuinely key to heart coherence and a balanced ANS.

Also, this Lockdown has taught me how very much there is to be enjoyed in the simplest things, without need for external affirmation, travel or money.

Let’s do the Inner Balance practice.

***15minInnerBalanceMed – 61% high coherence – av. coherence 2.5***

 

Screenshot of Inner Balance app

[Not my best. I’m a bit nervy about the amount of work and prep I need to do today.

So, dear soul, please go ahead and prep. Work more with #ILoveWhat’sComing. Let’s pick up from here tomorrow.]

*****Back the next day****

This Inner Balance device is teaching me to really get calm and present before I do things – delivering an online training session for example; or to use my daily walk to riff on what I’m appreciating in my mind. Why is this so powerful? It means I’m spending more of my day in coherence. I hadn’t realised now much of my day I was spending in the stress state of incoherence and sympathetic ANS. This device is making me more aware. And I think the results are becoming apparent.

Last night, I slept 7h50mins between 22.02pm and 06.48am according to my FitBit! With really good restorative sleep – meaning  my heart rate actually dropped below my resting heart beat for most of the night. Look:

FitBit screenshots of sleep data today
FitBit screenshots of sleep data today

 

Playing #ILoveWhat’sComing is a really good way to get into the positive present too, and bring a sense of appreciation, optimism and relief about the future. (This is basically the antidote to anxiety – what a gift!)

Let’s do today’s Inner Balance session.

***15minInnerBalanceMed – 77% high coherence – av. coherence 3.3***

Inner Balance app screen shot today
Inner Balance app screen shot today

Do you know what helped me settle in to high coherence?

  1. Following the breathing ‘chaser’ and holding ‘no thought’ – just very neutral in my brain
  2. Then, bringing in real time affirmation – first ‘I am safe, I am ok, I am sitting here’… then more in the Abraham-Hicks morning rampage of appreciation mode: ‘Here I am, and everything is working out for me. Good things are coming to me today. I’m doing so well…’

Useful to know. Honestly, the Inner Balance device is like a kindly lie detector – the moment you slip in to ruminative thought or anxious sensations, it notifies you! Amazing.

So today?

Today is a good day, a really good day. Everything is working out for you. Everything is going smoothly, and there’s really no need to bring too much energy (or ‘zazz’) to what you do today. It’s all under control. You have a great routine and it covers all that needs to be covered. So you can relax, safe in the knowledge that all good things are flowing to you, and the more you settle in to neutral mind or the positive present, the more you are lining up with all the good things, and the more you will be able to relish what is. Yes, relish what is. 

I love the word ‘relish’. What is ‘zazz’?

Zazz is the surge of energy you put in to something that you very much want to work well. Only, it is often so ‘surgey’ that it shorts the circuits. It certainly introduces incoherence. Your zazz is generated by the belief that effort makes the thing work. But nature is not like that. Time, sun, water, patience and relishing make all the things work: the trees to grow and the fruits to appear as if from nothing. Remember your Tao Te Ching? Softly does it, dear soul. Softly does it. 

If you have energy to pour in to a moment, pour it in to relishing what already is, and what you sense to be coming of its own accord. 

Beautiful – and will take a bit of practising. Thank you so much.

I am relishing what is, and what is coming (#NoZazz)

Relish

to like or enjoy something:
I always relish a challenge.
 
If you relish the idea or thought of something, you feel pleasure that it is going to happen:
She’s relishing the prospect of studying in Bologna for six months.
the enjoyment you get from doing something:
She ate her cake slowly and with relish.

 

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Pivot 92: I am noting this positive present

Screen shot of hearth math app

***10minInnerBalanceMeditation***

This HeartMath Inner Balance device might just save my life. It’s literally a machine you can use while meditating that buzzes when you get carried away in thought, nudging you to come back to heart-focussed breathing. No more ‘getting carried away in thought’ for minutes at a time! That’s done. And you learn how your body feels when you move out of Heart in to default Head – it’s so subtle that without the instant biofeedback it’s hard to notice. That’s why people find meditation so hard. THIS IS MY ZEN MACHINE that allows me to practise the teachings of Zen Mind with full confidence that I am learning the skills.

And why might it save my life? Because my autistic brain is super busy; and energy leakage has been a big issue.  I need, need, need to calm and regulate my ANS. The only way to do that is to learn to get in to the parasympathetic state, at will – and stay there long enough to reboot my system. This machine, along with the Zen Mind teachings, is the answer to that desire I set out with early on in the Pivot Project: to discover my Aspie Zen Zone.

And what I love most is that the answer to the Aspie Zen Zone came down to – it’s so beautiful – it came down to tuning in to the Heart. Thank you for this journey of discovery.

 

Screen shot of hearth math app
Inner Balance session 22may20

 

For today..?

You learnt today that the best way to generate coherence with the Inner Balance was to affirm something positive in the present tense: I am ok; I am safe; everything’s fine; it’s all good… This is the mantra set for your day. See how often you can affirm your positive present across the day – and feel it in your body. Note what you are doing that is good and heart-warming or simply neutral in the present moment – and feel the heart’s resting in to that knowing. 

I am noting the positive present?

Yes – really easy. In the body. Lean back. Look about. Note what’s happening – it’s all positive if you’re noticing it in real time, even if it’s hard: ‘Ah, I’m having difficulty with my tech. I see. Good that I can observe this. I’m still safe. I’m ok. I am here. I am watching.’ 

And feel it in your body… Let the relief hiccup occur. And the sigh of breath. The settling in and down. 

Ok. Will do. Thank you….

The present moment is always, always positive – because it is 100% neutral. Review Eckhart Tolle or ACIM if that is helpful to you. 

The present is always a gift. 

I see what you did there. Thank you!

I am noting this positive present

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Pivot 90: I am learning what makes my Heart sing

Yesterday, ‘running an organised clinic’ was such a satisfactory and heart-lifting day. There was a powerful experience of NO LONGER being head down pushing my own agenda/business, grimly grinding through ‘back stage’ admin, but of being re-organised and re-orientated towards availability. My new scheduling system is amazing. No more emails about ‘diarising’ , and then, when in scheduled meetings (with a start and an end, crucially), people (and me) valuing my/our limited time, and our being more efficient.

I had this strong sense of…:

‘It’s my mission in mediation to facilitate the improved psychological wellbeing of all.’ #IPWOA

Why ‘of all’? Well, in mediation, when we find resolution, this brings IPW to the parties, to their families/colleagues/dependents, to me (I am nourished by the work), the community and the All across time and space- intergenerational healing is a thing to.

I can’t tell you the relief this brings, because it so RESONATES. Something has happened in these last weeks that’s allowed me to feel I can be of service in the psychological sphere – before, I had withheld that belief…

[Study Time: Did the intro to the Mindfulness at Work 7 day course]

Yesterday, my Inner Balance  device arrived. Let’s try it out with the app too. Here’s an intro video.

***5minInnerBalanceSession***

That was interesting! The Inner Balance heart monitor and smart phone app make for a clever, simple biofeedback device. If your mind jumps on to something funky (= heart incoherence), you can see it on the screen (and the phone buzzes). Similarly, once you rise into a heart-focussed state (heart coherence) you see that too. And the shift is palpable in the body – I’d just never noted that Feeling 1 was ‘incoherence’ and Feeling 2 was ‘coherence’. That’s what biofeedback is for – to coach you into knowing your own body and brain better, and reading its signals better.

A bit daunted that I’m meant to use it for 5 mins 3 times a day. Let’s see!

I noted that settling in to a thought of ‘well-organised clinic’ gave me excellent heart coherence!

So for today?

Use your Inner Balance machine – before events with other people. 

I have 2 client calls, an online training to deliver and my fortnightly psychotherapy.

Perfect. Note down what thoughts/images give you a sense of heart coherence. 

Ah, this is the Memory Bank idea I had.

Exactly. What is in your past, present and future Memory Bank? What uplifts your Heart. 

So use the Inner Balance not just to calm myself before meetings with people, but to work out what makes my Heart sing… Nice. 

I am learning what makes my Heart sing